sister WONG is my companion!!! she was in singapore with sister fergeson. she is older than me in the mission. american born chinese. very very very hard worker. very hard. very smart. very intelligent. we talked alllllll night last night about goals and visions and everything for KK. we are gonna tear it up together. the president told her that he felt like we needed to be together. he said KK wasn't going as fast as it should be, and he said that I was a fireball with a lot to give. so he told her that it was her responsibility to get to KK and let the "fire" shine from me. and then he emailed me this week and said how much he loved wong and knew that our companionship was going to be amazing and he said he had so much faith in us. it was such a nice email!!!! so it is nice. I feel rejuvinated and so happy. not much to report, she only got here last night, but it is going well. it's gonna be big. I don't know when I'll transfer. could transfer in a month, could get a greenie in a month and have a threesome here, I don't know:/ but whatever it is, I'm very excited excited excited for the future. very nice:)
I cant believe taylor is going to argentina!!! good for him!!!!!!! that'd be amazing to see the temple.
also, president reminded us we have a time allotment for our internet usage. we got too lax with email time and so he sent an email reminding us of the rules. first, we have to email both parents if we can. good emails he said. second we have to email him a good email. third, we have to read all the mission office sends. and fourth, if by some chance theres more time in our hour, we can email other people. but only after all three are done. so, I'm not sure if I'm gonna be doing the blog thing. I might just email you and dad. what do you think about that? or should I do more the blog thing and then just try to write individual letters? I'll go with how you feel on that matter. but I want to be obedient with exactness. I really do. so I want to make sure that I follow the rules and make it an hour. but I don't want to get gipped on you guys time:/
I know missions bless us, and I think one of the blessings isn't like all the sudden we serve and we come home and we have all these big amazing things and opportunities that pop up, but it's that on a mission we learn how to work. we learn how to set goals. how to be diligent. and those skills are blessings that we can take home and with them make big things and big opportunities happen. missions are amazing and I have always had really huge goals. still do. unfortunately I still don't know the exact path I want to go yet. but it's gonna be big. I wrote a little about it in my letter you'll be getting shortly:)
I'm feeling very happy and exhilarated and SO HAPPY TO BE A MISSIONARY right now. so happy.
thank you so much for your support. I love you so so much. so much.
I hope all is well.
Wednesday, September 28
Wednesday, September 21
Love
 |
| Mine and dad's name tags |
hello!
I am very short on time today....sorry. I wanted to email mom and dad and gibbons. hah!
but in a quick little report:
we have been SO SO SO BUSY!!!!!!!! it has been unreal. lots of teaching and we come home exhausted every night. seriously! I fall asleep on the bus quite often as well.
we just had zone conference and that was amazing. I love conferences. they always leave you wanting to be a better missionary. this one made me leave wanting to be a better person. one thing that I wanted to share that I spoke to president a lot about was the difference between "faith promoting" experiences and "faith perfecting" experiences. at first I didn't know, but now I have most definitely come to believe in the difference. faith promoting is when you have faith, you ask for something, and you get it. that promotes your faith. you think, "wow! Heavenly Father does listen to me so He gave me what I asked." faith perfecting experiences are when you have faith, you ask for something, and you don't get it. maybe you ask for someone to be healed, and they don't get healed. maybe they get sicker. at this point, I have seen a ton on my mission that people get there and go, "Heavenly Father doesn't even care. this person is sicker. He didn't listen." and then they check out. they're done with the whole thing. but then there are some people, also that I have seen on my mission, that keep going. they keep the faith, they keep walking through the struggles, and keep looking to Heavenly Father for the strength. and they find the strength there, and they make it. and then on the other side, they tell you about how much they learned and how grateful they are that they were able to go through that and be stronger. so in that kind of situation, your faith becomes "perfected" or more perfected. I have felt on my mission as well, sometimes I get upset that I didn't get the blessing or the help that I thought I needed and I questioned my faith for a second. just a second. but I really believe that it's through the hard times that we grow. at least I have. and we talked about that at zone conference and how we can help our investigators understand the difference, and I thought it was very inspiring.
okay since there is no time and I forgot my planner with all the funny things I wanted to say, I'll just share our last nights experience. so we were at Roslin and Hendrry's house, clear out in the deep boonies, when it starts to rain. at first, just a bit of a drizzle. but it's late, like six, and we had another appointment we needed to get to, so we knew we needed to leave. even though Roslin kept freaking out that we were gonna walk in the rain, we assured her it was no big deal. just a little drizzle:) so we start our walk home, it's very very dark at this point, when the rain starts to get a bit harder. and harder. and harder. and lightning. and thunder. and dark. and harder. and about this point I understood where the phrase "raining cats and dogs" comes from. I am the only one with an umbrella, which we are trying to share, but it's a little umbrella compared to those rain drops. so we keep walking, thank goodness it's like a forever long walk on the side of the road with no sidewalk, just a bit of mud and grass and then a big deep drainage system. a short walk with a sidewalk would make things not as funny. so we're walking and we're yelling trying to communicate with eachother and we are just DYING laughing because it's so hysterical, when I all of the sudden fall into a bit of a hole, and in the process, break my brand new sandals! so I'm down a shoe! I keep trying to walk and just make it work but basically it's ridiculous because as I tried to keep it on my foot and keep walking I tripped again. so by this point we are crying we are laughing so hard. I've basically put the umbrella away because it is no use, and I'm carrying a shoe and walking barefooted in the dirt/mood/flood/rat filled water thing. we finally get to a street corner, waiting for a car to cross so we could cross, when said car hits the puddle/flood on the side of the road, and sends a tidal wave of mud straight into our face and open mouths. hite was doubled over because she was laughing so hard, and I just gave up, threw my head back and was dying. anyway, we struggle struggle struggle for the forty minute walk to the bus stop, and by the time we got into the bus we looked absolutely disgusting, we smelled, we were dripping wet, and we were both so happy. I looked at her and was like hite, you have no idea how grateful I am that you are my companion right now. that could have been a miserable walk but with her it was hysterical. the night didn't end when we got onto the bus though, we ended up having to get off, find a taxi, still in the rain, still with one shoe, at one point I tried to put it back on because I saw a rat crawling on the ground a few feet away and I got freaked out, but that was a hopeless case so I took it off again. then we got to a mall where we were hoping to seek refuge from the storm, but I realized we couldn't go in if I didn't have shoes!!! so I put the broken sandal back on and had to slide my foot across the floor as I walked. I looked like an absolute idiot, and hite was dying even still because she was laughing so hard, and yes. it was just gold. we got to our next appointment and they said we looked like wet rats. not far from the truth! that's what you get for walking with wet rats!it was a good night though.
a good day.
life is really good, you know?
I'm very blessed out here.
dad sent me the picture of all of you at the cabin with bee and tessbabe holding the "I miss you Lisa" sign and I started crying. haha! that picture is proudly on display on my desk now:) thanks for remembering and caring. I love you all so so much. to singapore and back.
ps, I included a few photographs. in case you get bored with my writing:)
chicken anus:) yep! little circular chicken sphincters, all grilled on a shishkabob. with the butt bones in them and all. :)
Wednesday, September 14
Hello
wow. the weeks fly by. I can't believe it's another one. seriously! if I had a dollar for every time I said that though...a broken record. maybe I'm getting old. that's why I repeat myself. or it's the sun. whatever it is, it's certainly not my fault. :)
so this week! it has been a whirlwind. but if I may include a slight guilty pleasure right up front, yesterday we were on the bus coming back from Dongonggon after a very long and hot day, and the bus ride is usually about an hour. no air conditioning. plus it was raining, so no one would open their windows. very stuffy. we were soooooo tired. anyway, I was just sitting there chatting up the boy next to me, when guess what comes on the radio?? nonstop EARTH WIND AND FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!! woowee!!!!!! the fact that I didn't stand up and dance down the aisle (despite every powerful urge inside of me!) is proof that I'm changing and learning to be more appropriate. you know, bridle your passion kind of thing? anyway. I did tap my foot for a few of the songs and then the boy and I started singing (quietly!) together. hahaha. it was rad.
also a quick little funny story. so, you know that stage you get in right after you fall asleep? it's a weird state. anyway, I was in that state a few nights ago, and hite hadn't gone to bed quite yet. anyway, what follows is quite funny. she told me the next morning with tears in her eyes. so apparently she comes in, I'm asleep, and puts her blanket on my foot. when I go, "is someone sitting on my foot?" so she goes, "no, sorry, just my blanket." and then I go, "oh okay. at first I thought it was a bird, but then I remembered missionary work isn't done through birds." and then she starts laughing I guess, and is like, "are you awake??" and I go, "hey don't laugh! I felt his claws on my foot!!!" and then she diiiiieeeesssssss laughing and eventually I wake up to her laughing hysterically, so I start laughing hysterically although I didn't really know why, and then the next morning she was still laughing trying to tell me the story. anyway. that was a pointless and completely unspiritual story, but I liked it because it's ridiculous. and sometimes its the best thing you can do to just hold on and remember the ridiculously stupid and hilarious moments.
so here is a real doozy of an experience. I'm still a bit devastated, although I'm trying to pull it together. so sunday night we had plans to do family night with some people that lived in kepayan. we were late getting there and it was so stressful and it started raining and finally when we got there, they told us they were sorry but couldn't do it anymore. so we started walking all the way back, when david (a member who always helps us) said he wanted to go visit some people who also lived in kepayan and asked if we wanted to go. we were both dead tired and hadn't eaten all day long, so we said we just didn't feel like it and wanted to go cook something really fast. so we start walking back when we pass by this man that goes, "are you from a church?" we say yes, start talking, and he just starts spilling about his life. he had tried to kill himself twice in the last week because so many awful things were happening to him. and he said he didn't know why he hadn't died both times he tried, but he thought maybe because God wasn't ready for him to go yet. he said he had been praying for miracles. anyway we meet him, talk a bit about the plan of salvation and ask if there is anything we can do. he said he was living at the catholic church and couldn't do anything yet, but he'd call us. anyway, we go home and I just sat on the floor of my shower fully clothed with the water running. that's the remedy for a truly awful experience. I was aching inside my heart because I hadn't known what to do or what to say or anything and I kept thinking that if he killed himself that night it would be on me. I was having a hard time. never prayed harder than that night for him and for a chance to help him see that he still has a purpose and that life is still good. anyway I fall asleep, and we woke up the next morning to a text from him. he said he read the pamphlet, has some questions, and would like to meet. we planned sooooo hard for the lesson with him, scriptures after scriptures, idea after idea, we were both freaking out. we called our zone leaders and asked him for advice and he helped a bit and then said something like, "this is really cool. you could have a chance to literally save a life." so we meet him and sit down and he immediately starts talking when he tells us about a dream. he goes, "for the first time in months I slept all night last night. very peaceful sleep. and I had a dream of this girl, this white girl, named jensen. and she gave me a paint brush. and I don't know why, but after that everything was light and bliss." and I'm just standing there, stunned, and go, "my name is sister jensen." so he's like "wow....really? that's weird!" and then immediately starts talking again. talking about how miserable his life is, how all he wants are friends, he needs a miracle but God isn't showing him any miracles, blah blah blah. finally after an hour and a half of him talking and not letting us say anything, he stands up to go and says he is gonna kill himself that night. the whole time during that lesson I had no words coming to my mind, but when he stood up and said that I suddenly couldn't hold it back and I yelled at him STOP! and then I tell him that there are miracles all around him! the fact that our appointment was cancelled and for whatever reason we didn't go with david to the other place, so we walked past him was a miracle. and that maybe his dream was another miracle. I told him how else would he have had a dream about a white girl named jensen, when he didn't know that that was my name? I had only told him sister when we met. so I said "you had a dream about me, and I gave you a paintbrush. and I was like, I love to paint! and to make art and to make something beautiful, you need a paintbrush." (this sounds lame repeating this but these words were just coming out of my mouth) so I go, "we have a message for you. and if you will give it a chance, I promise you it will change your life. and it will be a paintbrush for you, with this message about Jesus Christ and His Atonement, it will help you paint a better life for yourself." and he like froze and had goosebumps. and he was like, "whoa. I don't even know what to say." so the day goes on and we walk him to the fruit market because he wanted to go there, and he keeps saying how much light we have and how much different he feels around us. blah blah. it was a nice afternoon and he was smiling and laughing and having fun. he said he'd read the book and get back to us. so later that night we get a text, something like this: "I've thought about it and I don't need God. He doesn't care about me because He isn't helping me. there are no miracles. I don't want Him. I need friends and that's all, but maybe I'll just try to kill myself again." and we both were devastated all over again. we didn't even know what to say. we prayed about it and prayed about it and all we could feel was just that we had tried. we had tried and prepared and planned and done everything we could even think of. but we cant make people see the light. or see the miracles around them. its been a day and we haven't heard from him, so we have no idea what is going on. it is hard. but it helped me look at the plan of salvation in a completely different light. people always say we live through Christ. right? I never really thought what that even means. living through Christ. but literally, He died and was resurrected so we can die and be resurrected. if we look to Him and follow Him, we have eternal life. without Christ, it would end after we died. it would end because we would still be sinful unresurrected beings buried in the ground. but through Jesus Christ, we live. and thinking about that man who wanted to kill himself so badly, I realized just how real the plan of salvation could have been to him. if he would have realized that if he just hung on and clung to Jesus Christ, he would live. we tried our hardest.
aside from that very emotional and dramatic experience, the week was very nice. we are SO busy. so freaking busy. it's so great always having to move a thousand miles and hour so we can get everywhere we need to be, and it makes the days fly by. but I literally have never been this physically and mentally and spiritually tired in my whole life. hahaha. we were teaching crystal and darien, angels brother and sister (they have a baptism date on the 15 of october!!!) and right before the taxi came I layed on the floor and my whole body was convulsing haha. josie comes over and is like, "sister, you're too tired. you're worthless now. look, you can't even hold still! you're worthless!" haha. brat. but really, it is so beautiful being this busy. such a blessing. the work is picking up and miracles are happening in KK right now and it is golden.
hite only has a week and a half left. I think she's having a hard time haha. poor girl. it's weird to think one day I will be in her shoes as well.
times on its way out, but I love you all. I hope this week is gold:)
so this week! it has been a whirlwind. but if I may include a slight guilty pleasure right up front, yesterday we were on the bus coming back from Dongonggon after a very long and hot day, and the bus ride is usually about an hour. no air conditioning. plus it was raining, so no one would open their windows. very stuffy. we were soooooo tired. anyway, I was just sitting there chatting up the boy next to me, when guess what comes on the radio?? nonstop EARTH WIND AND FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!! woowee!!!!!! the fact that I didn't stand up and dance down the aisle (despite every powerful urge inside of me!) is proof that I'm changing and learning to be more appropriate. you know, bridle your passion kind of thing? anyway. I did tap my foot for a few of the songs and then the boy and I started singing (quietly!) together. hahaha. it was rad.
also a quick little funny story. so, you know that stage you get in right after you fall asleep? it's a weird state. anyway, I was in that state a few nights ago, and hite hadn't gone to bed quite yet. anyway, what follows is quite funny. she told me the next morning with tears in her eyes. so apparently she comes in, I'm asleep, and puts her blanket on my foot. when I go, "is someone sitting on my foot?" so she goes, "no, sorry, just my blanket." and then I go, "oh okay. at first I thought it was a bird, but then I remembered missionary work isn't done through birds." and then she starts laughing I guess, and is like, "are you awake??" and I go, "hey don't laugh! I felt his claws on my foot!!!" and then she diiiiieeeesssssss laughing and eventually I wake up to her laughing hysterically, so I start laughing hysterically although I didn't really know why, and then the next morning she was still laughing trying to tell me the story. anyway. that was a pointless and completely unspiritual story, but I liked it because it's ridiculous. and sometimes its the best thing you can do to just hold on and remember the ridiculously stupid and hilarious moments.
so here is a real doozy of an experience. I'm still a bit devastated, although I'm trying to pull it together. so sunday night we had plans to do family night with some people that lived in kepayan. we were late getting there and it was so stressful and it started raining and finally when we got there, they told us they were sorry but couldn't do it anymore. so we started walking all the way back, when david (a member who always helps us) said he wanted to go visit some people who also lived in kepayan and asked if we wanted to go. we were both dead tired and hadn't eaten all day long, so we said we just didn't feel like it and wanted to go cook something really fast. so we start walking back when we pass by this man that goes, "are you from a church?" we say yes, start talking, and he just starts spilling about his life. he had tried to kill himself twice in the last week because so many awful things were happening to him. and he said he didn't know why he hadn't died both times he tried, but he thought maybe because God wasn't ready for him to go yet. he said he had been praying for miracles. anyway we meet him, talk a bit about the plan of salvation and ask if there is anything we can do. he said he was living at the catholic church and couldn't do anything yet, but he'd call us. anyway, we go home and I just sat on the floor of my shower fully clothed with the water running. that's the remedy for a truly awful experience. I was aching inside my heart because I hadn't known what to do or what to say or anything and I kept thinking that if he killed himself that night it would be on me. I was having a hard time. never prayed harder than that night for him and for a chance to help him see that he still has a purpose and that life is still good. anyway I fall asleep, and we woke up the next morning to a text from him. he said he read the pamphlet, has some questions, and would like to meet. we planned sooooo hard for the lesson with him, scriptures after scriptures, idea after idea, we were both freaking out. we called our zone leaders and asked him for advice and he helped a bit and then said something like, "this is really cool. you could have a chance to literally save a life." so we meet him and sit down and he immediately starts talking when he tells us about a dream. he goes, "for the first time in months I slept all night last night. very peaceful sleep. and I had a dream of this girl, this white girl, named jensen. and she gave me a paint brush. and I don't know why, but after that everything was light and bliss." and I'm just standing there, stunned, and go, "my name is sister jensen." so he's like "wow....really? that's weird!" and then immediately starts talking again. talking about how miserable his life is, how all he wants are friends, he needs a miracle but God isn't showing him any miracles, blah blah blah. finally after an hour and a half of him talking and not letting us say anything, he stands up to go and says he is gonna kill himself that night. the whole time during that lesson I had no words coming to my mind, but when he stood up and said that I suddenly couldn't hold it back and I yelled at him STOP! and then I tell him that there are miracles all around him! the fact that our appointment was cancelled and for whatever reason we didn't go with david to the other place, so we walked past him was a miracle. and that maybe his dream was another miracle. I told him how else would he have had a dream about a white girl named jensen, when he didn't know that that was my name? I had only told him sister when we met. so I said "you had a dream about me, and I gave you a paintbrush. and I was like, I love to paint! and to make art and to make something beautiful, you need a paintbrush." (this sounds lame repeating this but these words were just coming out of my mouth) so I go, "we have a message for you. and if you will give it a chance, I promise you it will change your life. and it will be a paintbrush for you, with this message about Jesus Christ and His Atonement, it will help you paint a better life for yourself." and he like froze and had goosebumps. and he was like, "whoa. I don't even know what to say." so the day goes on and we walk him to the fruit market because he wanted to go there, and he keeps saying how much light we have and how much different he feels around us. blah blah. it was a nice afternoon and he was smiling and laughing and having fun. he said he'd read the book and get back to us. so later that night we get a text, something like this: "I've thought about it and I don't need God. He doesn't care about me because He isn't helping me. there are no miracles. I don't want Him. I need friends and that's all, but maybe I'll just try to kill myself again." and we both were devastated all over again. we didn't even know what to say. we prayed about it and prayed about it and all we could feel was just that we had tried. we had tried and prepared and planned and done everything we could even think of. but we cant make people see the light. or see the miracles around them. its been a day and we haven't heard from him, so we have no idea what is going on. it is hard. but it helped me look at the plan of salvation in a completely different light. people always say we live through Christ. right? I never really thought what that even means. living through Christ. but literally, He died and was resurrected so we can die and be resurrected. if we look to Him and follow Him, we have eternal life. without Christ, it would end after we died. it would end because we would still be sinful unresurrected beings buried in the ground. but through Jesus Christ, we live. and thinking about that man who wanted to kill himself so badly, I realized just how real the plan of salvation could have been to him. if he would have realized that if he just hung on and clung to Jesus Christ, he would live. we tried our hardest.
aside from that very emotional and dramatic experience, the week was very nice. we are SO busy. so freaking busy. it's so great always having to move a thousand miles and hour so we can get everywhere we need to be, and it makes the days fly by. but I literally have never been this physically and mentally and spiritually tired in my whole life. hahaha. we were teaching crystal and darien, angels brother and sister (they have a baptism date on the 15 of october!!!) and right before the taxi came I layed on the floor and my whole body was convulsing haha. josie comes over and is like, "sister, you're too tired. you're worthless now. look, you can't even hold still! you're worthless!" haha. brat. but really, it is so beautiful being this busy. such a blessing. the work is picking up and miracles are happening in KK right now and it is golden.
hite only has a week and a half left. I think she's having a hard time haha. poor girl. it's weird to think one day I will be in her shoes as well.
times on its way out, but I love you all. I hope this week is gold:)
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