WHAT A WEEK. can you believe it's Christmas this week? I'm still having a hard time accepting that. what did we do last Christmas? I remember music playlists, walks in the snow with jams in my ears, dancing with tessbabe and bee, and home made pizzas. man. can't believe it's been a year already. can you guys?
all the missionaries were invited to a very nice christmas breakfast at the senior couples house. elder and sister hodder from canada. it was the most white people food I've seen in so long! there was food I totally forgot even existed! like bacon! bacon, sausage, potatoes, french toast, maple syrup.....geeze! I was freaking out. the worst part is that I couldnt even eat hardly at all. I'm out of practice of eating white people food. but give me a plate of rice and some curry!
oh one more really really gooooooood food story that I don't think you guys will believe so that is why I see it worthy to include. my favorite meal in miri, hands down, is this little shack that has this huge grill that they grill up pig. every single part of pig. and they put it on kabobs, grill it up, and then bring it to you with mismatched plates filled with rice, and little dishes of "belacan" this homemade sauce stuff that is sometimes made with shrimp paste but this kind is just hot hot HOT chili. and I go through like four bowls of the belacan because it is so good. your lips literally tingle because it is so hot but it is so delicious. oh and cucumbers. so my favorite meal, pig, rice, chili, cucumbers. does that sound good? words don't even explain how delicious it is. and now I'm craving it all over.
so I want to share a scripture that has been on my mind literally all week. gibbons gave it to me, so I can't take credit. but its in ezekial 36:26- "A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh." first of all, I loved the imagery of that. I remembered the day I got to watch my first open heart surgery, and the womans heart was beating in her open chest cavity. I will never forget that moment, because I had never seen something so....I want to say beautiful. and thinking of this scripture, where you used to have a heart of stone. and through Christ, our hearts can be changed to a heart of flesh. and I do have a testimony of that. in the book of mormon a few times it talks about the people getting wicked and being "past feeling" and I can understand a little bit. past feeling, almost like your heart is stone. but when we pray for charity, when we remember Christ and follow his commandments, when we try our very best to love the people around us and ourselves, at least for me, I can feel my stone heart being changed to a heart of flesh. like the one pumping in the woman laying on the operating table. and I love that. a new heart of flesh.
I will close with one of those big, mind opening experiences that I think are very special to missions only. I'm not really sure how I would have learned this lesson elsewhere. So we have this family of investigators, an entire family. a big family. and the head of the family is named Richard. he is amazing. his testimony and his families is so unbelievably strong. and their baptism is this saturday. the only problem, richard used to have a problem with smoking and drinking. we taught him the word of wisdom, and two weeks (the deadline) before his upcoming baptism, he said that he had completely stopped everything. and bore testimony that it was only because of Christ and because this is the right time, blah blah blah, that he was able to stop. problem though, everytime we meet him, I get this off feeling when asking if he is still following the word of wisdom. he always says he has no problems, but for whatever reason, I just always found it hard to believe him. well last night, we walk up to his house for our appointment, and there he is with his "boys", shirt off, beer cans in front of him, with a cig in his hand. I straight up saw him. only thing, he didn't see that I saw him. so when his friends said we were here, he immediately ran and jumped in the shower. a few minutes later he comes out, walks over, sits down with his family, like nothing ever happened. his family just immediately looks down, ashamed, they totally know that we know. so anyway, we sing, pray, start the lesson like normal. and we go around with everyone, asking them how they are doing with reading, praying, if they have questions, how the word of wisdom is, and we get to richard. rinet was scared to ask him, so I asked him. he looked at me, straight in the eyes, and said he had not been smoking or drinking for two weeks. and he was dead serious. it was one of those moments where the Spirit just constrained me, because I just looked at him and didn't say one thing. and he proceeded to continue and tell me over and over that he hadn't smoked, hadn't drank, he was so grateful that he was able to drop the bad habit, and that he was ready to be baptized. we had already explained that when we follow the commandments and the missionaries ask them about it, they aren't really answering the missionaries, they're answering to God. telling God. and after all of that, he still just looked at me and lied. in that moment of me just looking at him, devastated, listening to him explain all this and all that, my mind couldn't help but wonder if what I was feeling was like how our parents feel, or even God, when we lie. here is this man, that I just love. seriously, love. and I had so much faith in him! so much hope! and I see him smoking and drinking, and he just is lying to me! my heart seriously broke more than it has on my mission I think. so anyway. that was probably really confusing, but moral of the story. I understand a little better, the heartache a person can feel when someone they love tries to lie to them. it's devastating. and the even more devastating thing? all he has to do is be honest. be honest with us, with himself, with God, repent, and pick it back up and go again. but he's not doing that.
and after that long sad story, I'm going to close with a quick Merry Christmas!! I hope it's freezing wherever you are:) I love you all.
Tuesday, December 13
HELLO.
wow it's almost Christmas. and I got a package from mum and from Vickie and Tricia! wow! how did I get so lucky? I thought people forgot about you when you're clear in the middle of a jungle somewhere. rad, I guess they dont:) thank you all a thousand times.
so this week.
first of all, Lowe left. basically, that broke my heart in two. I hate that she's gone. she gave a whole new sense of life to me, and it would be a lie to say I don't feel her absence. she served long and good here. 15 months! and she gave it everything she had. an amazing example for me.
before she left though, we both got bit by a dog. yep. bit by a dog!! the dog got her skirt, and my hand and my skirt. my skirt is shredded now haha but thankfully not really that bad of broken skin on my hand. we were walking past and the dog had just barely given birth or something so she was protecting her babes. I guess I don't blame her, but geeze! terrifying.
so I had to give a talk at the baptism last week, and they didn't tell me until I sat down. so I had no time to prepare. and so after the song I stood up and gave a talk in malay. and I wasn't even scared! I just spoke. no big deal. because seriously, it's not anymore. you teach all day every day so it's no different anymore. but when I sat down I remembered my first baptism in KK I had to give a talk. I wanted to cryyy! I was so nervous! and I freaked out about it and looked up a thousand words to use that I forgot as soon as I stood up and it was so scary. so comparing the feelings and the experiences of both of them, it kindof hit me how far I've come. wow. who would have thought I would be able to speak malay!? rinet even says I'm the best one. which I know she's lying, but hey. a little insincere compliment now and then is welcomed:)
one really cool story. so. Josie called me the other night from KK and I just cried. that morning I woke up a bit blue. so I sat there during studies thinking, "man, if I could just hear my moms voice I think I would be cured." and then I immediately kicked that thought out, cause that obviously wasn't possible. my next thought was, "too bad I'm not in KK. I'd just call Josie and she'd make it better." that wasn't possible either, because we have rules against calling people out of our zone. so I went and found the gorgeous sketch/poem Josie and Rudy made for me before I left KK and read it. It helped, gave me some spirit, and then we went on with the rest of our day like normal. no big deal. on our ride home it was stormy so soooooo windy and soooooo rainy and by the time we got home we were soaked and exhausted and I just layed on the floor, thinking how grateful I was the day was over so we could sleep. haha. that tired! but as I layed there, I thought about Josie again. five seconds later, dead serious, the phone rings. I pick it up, "hai! apa khabar? ini sister jensen, siapa ini?" and all I hear is "ADIK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' (means "little sibling") and I realize it's Josie. so immediately, tears in my eyes, and she goes, "I'm sorry I'm breaking your rules by calling you but I have thought about you all day and felt like you needed me! I had to call! I had to tell you I loved you and I miss you and me and angel and crystel and darien still pray for you every day!" and oh my gosh. I just bawled!! on my mission, I've been blessed to see the Lord's hand blessing and helping the people around me, and it is such an incredible testimony building experience for me. and sometimes, like with Josie calling, I see the Lord's hand so obvious in my life, and it's an even bigger testimony building experience. I know that God is exactly how Ammon taught King Lamoni: "...he looketh down upon all the children of men; and he knows all the thoughts and intents of the heart, for by his hand were they all created from the beginning." I think a lot of people have a misconception about God. that He doesn't exist, that He's scary, that all He wants to do is smite you and condemn you and blah blah blah. my testimony is that he is just as that verse says, he looks down on us, he sees us when we're struggling, he loves us. He knows exactly when we're struggling but we're doing okay and we're growing, but he also knows when we can't take it anymore. and at that moment, He sends us something to pick us back up. sometimes how he helps us is loud like when sister Josie called me, and sometimes He talks to us in very quiet and small ways. but they are there. we just need to look for them. when we look for them, and we start to notice all the beautiful little ways He communicates with us, that is when we can begin to really understand just how God really is.
I love you all so much.
so does God.
thanks for everything you do.
love you love you.
and congrats to Jess!!!!!!! send me pictures since I can't be there:(
wow it's almost Christmas. and I got a package from mum and from Vickie and Tricia! wow! how did I get so lucky? I thought people forgot about you when you're clear in the middle of a jungle somewhere. rad, I guess they dont:) thank you all a thousand times.
so this week.
first of all, Lowe left. basically, that broke my heart in two. I hate that she's gone. she gave a whole new sense of life to me, and it would be a lie to say I don't feel her absence. she served long and good here. 15 months! and she gave it everything she had. an amazing example for me.
before she left though, we both got bit by a dog. yep. bit by a dog!! the dog got her skirt, and my hand and my skirt. my skirt is shredded now haha but thankfully not really that bad of broken skin on my hand. we were walking past and the dog had just barely given birth or something so she was protecting her babes. I guess I don't blame her, but geeze! terrifying.
so I had to give a talk at the baptism last week, and they didn't tell me until I sat down. so I had no time to prepare. and so after the song I stood up and gave a talk in malay. and I wasn't even scared! I just spoke. no big deal. because seriously, it's not anymore. you teach all day every day so it's no different anymore. but when I sat down I remembered my first baptism in KK I had to give a talk. I wanted to cryyy! I was so nervous! and I freaked out about it and looked up a thousand words to use that I forgot as soon as I stood up and it was so scary. so comparing the feelings and the experiences of both of them, it kindof hit me how far I've come. wow. who would have thought I would be able to speak malay!? rinet even says I'm the best one. which I know she's lying, but hey. a little insincere compliment now and then is welcomed:)
one really cool story. so. Josie called me the other night from KK and I just cried. that morning I woke up a bit blue. so I sat there during studies thinking, "man, if I could just hear my moms voice I think I would be cured." and then I immediately kicked that thought out, cause that obviously wasn't possible. my next thought was, "too bad I'm not in KK. I'd just call Josie and she'd make it better." that wasn't possible either, because we have rules against calling people out of our zone. so I went and found the gorgeous sketch/poem Josie and Rudy made for me before I left KK and read it. It helped, gave me some spirit, and then we went on with the rest of our day like normal. no big deal. on our ride home it was stormy so soooooo windy and soooooo rainy and by the time we got home we were soaked and exhausted and I just layed on the floor, thinking how grateful I was the day was over so we could sleep. haha. that tired! but as I layed there, I thought about Josie again. five seconds later, dead serious, the phone rings. I pick it up, "hai! apa khabar? ini sister jensen, siapa ini?" and all I hear is "ADIK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' (means "little sibling") and I realize it's Josie. so immediately, tears in my eyes, and she goes, "I'm sorry I'm breaking your rules by calling you but I have thought about you all day and felt like you needed me! I had to call! I had to tell you I loved you and I miss you and me and angel and crystel and darien still pray for you every day!" and oh my gosh. I just bawled!! on my mission, I've been blessed to see the Lord's hand blessing and helping the people around me, and it is such an incredible testimony building experience for me. and sometimes, like with Josie calling, I see the Lord's hand so obvious in my life, and it's an even bigger testimony building experience. I know that God is exactly how Ammon taught King Lamoni: "...he looketh down upon all the children of men; and he knows all the thoughts and intents of the heart, for by his hand were they all created from the beginning." I think a lot of people have a misconception about God. that He doesn't exist, that He's scary, that all He wants to do is smite you and condemn you and blah blah blah. my testimony is that he is just as that verse says, he looks down on us, he sees us when we're struggling, he loves us. He knows exactly when we're struggling but we're doing okay and we're growing, but he also knows when we can't take it anymore. and at that moment, He sends us something to pick us back up. sometimes how he helps us is loud like when sister Josie called me, and sometimes He talks to us in very quiet and small ways. but they are there. we just need to look for them. when we look for them, and we start to notice all the beautiful little ways He communicates with us, that is when we can begin to really understand just how God really is.
I love you all so much.
so does God.
thanks for everything you do.
love you love you.
and congrats to Jess!!!!!!! send me pictures since I can't be there:(
Wednesday, December 7
New pictures from Sister Lowe
Pictures of my wonderful companions making Roti at our favorite Indian Restaurant. The outfits are the tradtional Indian Saris. They were actually mine from India but I gave them to them because they looked a whole lot cuter in them than I do.
ENJOY
Sister Lowe
 |
| with the elders Forsyth and Moody |
Lisa and Sister Rinet off to work
Tuesday, December 6
wow so close to christmas. and josh's birthday! almost right? the...10th? sorry I forgot the day, but if anyone talks to my dear brother in law josh, tell him happy birthday from malaysia. so...selamat hari jadi!
uh so this week. interesting week. we have this family of investigators, 8 people, and they are soooooo solid. the most incredible family ever. so anyway. so their aunt passed away this last week, and they have all sorts of ritual/tradition things they do when people die. it was intense. they invited us to their house to "sambayang" with them, so we go, and it ends up where we walk in to this long wooden room, no windows, and there are about 100 ibans crammed in there. just crammed. hardly any light at all. the only light source is coming from the front, just above the aunties dead body. so they save the body of the person that died, in the open, for two days. when we got there, there were two ladies doing this ritual thing involving sobbing, screaming, yelling, chanting, singing, and talking to the dead body. while the rest of the 100 people in the room just sit and drink hot milo and listen. if I understood sister rinet correctly, they cry because it has something to do with crying gets out bad spirits or something like that. I need to ask her to try to explain it again. but it was another one of those intense out of body experiences that make you realize you are not in kansas anymore.
I had some more weird food this week...one that I've actually eaten a lot, it's called belacan. you get this little tiny shrimp things and smoosh them up and make it into a paste and then add chili and some other stuff and it ends up being like this dip thing. it smells so wretched it's insane, but it actually tastes pretty good. I also ate fried worms this week. I didn't realize I was eating fried worms...those were actually really nasty. didn't appreciate that at all.
so here is a funny story. we have another family of investigators that are also incredibly solid. the grandpa, kindof head of the household, invited his daughter and her kids to come to a lesson the other day so we got to meet them. she had this 14 month old son named cornelius and he was absolutely adorable. only problem, he was terrified of me. I would look at him and smile, and he'd immediately start flailing his limbs about and screaming. my pride was bruised a bit, I won't lie. what kid doesn't like me? haha. so we started teaching, and this little boy would like sneeeak sneak over to me, soo quietly, and try to get as close as his bravery would allow him too. at one point he was about six inches from my face, when I turned to look at him, and he basically through his body backwards screaming, yelling "tatut!!! tatut!!!" which is takut, means scared. haha it was hysterical, but also so sad at the same time. so at the end of the lesson his mom finally tells me what the deal is. turns out, his biggest fear are barbie dolls. and he thought I was a barbie doll that was alive. hahahahaha. poor kid. probably had the worst nightmares of his life that night.
also, if you get to see that movie from sister lowe of us making roti, that was fun. we had a fun day. the man was pakistani and he taught me a little bit of the language. very interesting man.
and that's about it! I hope all is well with all you guys. love you so much.
uh so this week. interesting week. we have this family of investigators, 8 people, and they are soooooo solid. the most incredible family ever. so anyway. so their aunt passed away this last week, and they have all sorts of ritual/tradition things they do when people die. it was intense. they invited us to their house to "sambayang" with them, so we go, and it ends up where we walk in to this long wooden room, no windows, and there are about 100 ibans crammed in there. just crammed. hardly any light at all. the only light source is coming from the front, just above the aunties dead body. so they save the body of the person that died, in the open, for two days. when we got there, there were two ladies doing this ritual thing involving sobbing, screaming, yelling, chanting, singing, and talking to the dead body. while the rest of the 100 people in the room just sit and drink hot milo and listen. if I understood sister rinet correctly, they cry because it has something to do with crying gets out bad spirits or something like that. I need to ask her to try to explain it again. but it was another one of those intense out of body experiences that make you realize you are not in kansas anymore.
I had some more weird food this week...one that I've actually eaten a lot, it's called belacan. you get this little tiny shrimp things and smoosh them up and make it into a paste and then add chili and some other stuff and it ends up being like this dip thing. it smells so wretched it's insane, but it actually tastes pretty good. I also ate fried worms this week. I didn't realize I was eating fried worms...those were actually really nasty. didn't appreciate that at all.
so here is a funny story. we have another family of investigators that are also incredibly solid. the grandpa, kindof head of the household, invited his daughter and her kids to come to a lesson the other day so we got to meet them. she had this 14 month old son named cornelius and he was absolutely adorable. only problem, he was terrified of me. I would look at him and smile, and he'd immediately start flailing his limbs about and screaming. my pride was bruised a bit, I won't lie. what kid doesn't like me? haha. so we started teaching, and this little boy would like sneeeak sneak over to me, soo quietly, and try to get as close as his bravery would allow him too. at one point he was about six inches from my face, when I turned to look at him, and he basically through his body backwards screaming, yelling "tatut!!! tatut!!!" which is takut, means scared. haha it was hysterical, but also so sad at the same time. so at the end of the lesson his mom finally tells me what the deal is. turns out, his biggest fear are barbie dolls. and he thought I was a barbie doll that was alive. hahahahaha. poor kid. probably had the worst nightmares of his life that night.
also, if you get to see that movie from sister lowe of us making roti, that was fun. we had a fun day. the man was pakistani and he taught me a little bit of the language. very interesting man.
and that's about it! I hope all is well with all you guys. love you so much.
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